Against everyone else's judgement...

I'm going to try and see him tomorrow. It's not that I'm not listening, I hear what everyone is saying. I understand. I also know that no one else actually knows him and no one knows what I'm truly feeling. This is part of the problem of being as open as I am about my life and relationships. And, as most people do, I always talked more about the bad than the good. He had plenty of amazingly sweet times where he made me feel beautiful, happy, cared about and special. But I still feel like I'll be disappointing everyone if I give him another chance. And that no one will be accepting of him if I do and it works. But the thing is, after everything, I just need this. If I don't see him I will always question myself and what could have happened. I feel like if we had met six months prior or six months later than we did things might be a lot different. I know that you can't change someone, trust me I learned that lesson in my past relationships. The core of who someone is doesn't change just because they've entered a relationship with someone else. If he's someone who just doesn't pay attention to when plans are made that's not going to change and it's not something I'm willing to accept. BUT, I'm willing to let him try and explain. I've said it before - he is someone I know I could fall in love with. The last time I felt this strongly about someone was 3 years ago and I actually feel more this time around. I know that it's much better to be single and okay than in a relationship and miserable. I think though, this might be a chance for us to start over. Admittedly our "relationship" before was focused way too much on the bedroom and not enough on actually getting to know each other. At this point if things do work out the sex won't be returning any time soon and that could be a chance for us to become friends, know each other, and develop something real...